I find it most interesting

that the majority of Americans right now could probably tell you who Neda Agha-Soltani is, but very few could tell you who Allison Krause (most will mis-identify her as musician Alison Krauss) or Sandra Scheuer are.

Somebody's bullshitting somebody here

.
And I'm pretty sure neither somebody is me.

In case you didn't hear, "gossip blogger" and general waste of skin Perez Hilton was supposedly "assaulted" because someone didn't care for his comments. I won't comment on the merits of Hilton's allegations other than to note that in this image from MTV-UK, his "black eye" is on the left side. In the whiny video Hilton posted to his blog, the "cut" he's crying over is under his right eye.

See for yourself:



MTV pic



Screencap from video

Joke of the Month

Via a Sadly, No! commenter:

At the end of the year, the IRS sent an inspector to audit the books of a synagogue. While he was checking the books, he said to the Rabbi, “I notice you buy a lot of candles. What do you do with the candle drippings?”

“Good question,” noted the Rabbi. “We save them and then send them back to the candle maker, and every now and again they send us a box of complete candles.”

“Oh,” replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. On he went in his obnoxious way, “What about all these matzo purchases? What do you do with all the crumbs?”

“Ah, yes,” replied the Rabbi, realizing that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. “We collect them and send them back to the bakery, and every now and again they send us a box of complete matzo.”

“I see,” replied the frustrated auditor, now thinking harder about how he can fluster the know-it-all Rabbi. “Well Rabbi, what do you do with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions that you perform?”

“Here too we do not waste,” answered the Rabbi. “We save up all the foreskins and send them to the Internal Revenue Service, and every now and again they send us a back a complete dick.”

Best Blog comment EVAR on Iran

"Pull the triggers, sand n*ggers, we're with you all the way/Just across the bay"

One of Roy's commenters

If you didn't get it, scroll to about 2:50 in this video:



And yes, that is a very young John Belusi channelling Wavy Gravy in the first part of the clip.

Letterman is a pussy

First for apologizing, and second for telling such a lame joke in the first place.

Here's a REAL offensive Sarah Palin joke:

Q: What's the difference between Sarah Palin's mouth and her vagina?

A: Only one retarded thing has come out of her vagina.

David Carridine 1936-2009 RIP

The Rosy Palm Five Daughters Constricting Throat Technique claims yet another victim.

Oh please, oh please, oh please

From the Department of "Have You No Sense Of Decency, Sir?" comes the news that there may be "pro-life" protests at George Tiller's funeral.

Personally, I think this is a wonderful idea. Yeah, you "pro-life" turds - protest at a funeral and remind everybody one more time just how much you have in common with Fred Phelps and his merry band of lunatics.

Common ground? You should live so long, assholes.

Common Ground on Late-Term Abortion: Anguish

In a faceless building by the freeway, George Tiller performed thousands of abortions a year. Some of his patients were well advanced in pregnancy -- seven, eight, even nine months along. And so his clinic became a battleground.

. . .

Medical records subpoenaed by prosecutors in Kansas indicate Dr. Tiller approved some late-term abortions on the grounds that the women suffered from anxiety or depression. To opponents, those are shockingly flimsy excuses. But several attempts to prosecute Dr. Tiller for violating the law failed.

Among sane people, this phenomenon is known as being "acquitted" and indicates that you did not, in fact, violate the law.

I can't speak for anyone else, but I intend to honor Dr. Tiller's memory by rubbing the "pro-life" movement's nose in this incident at every opportunity for, oh, the rest of my life or until they get a clue, whichever comes first. "Pro-life" my motherfucking ass. Try "pro-sanity" for a change, bitches.

I have an idea

I'd like to get Scott Roeder a boyfriend. A big, mean boyfriend with large muscles and a bad temper.

Anybody got any friends (or enemies) matching that description doing a stretch at the Wichita jail? I'll bet a whole bunch of people would be willing to kick in for some cartons of smokes to make it worth their while.

At least they're finally admitting it

Poll: US divided over torture, closing Guantanamo

WASHINGTON – Just over half of Americans say torture is at least sometimes justified to thwart terrorist attacks and are evenly divided over whether to close the Guantanamo Bay prison, according to a poll that underscores the challenges President Barack Obama faces in selling his terror-fighting policies.

Well, it's about time. That's all I really wanted - for you worthless fucks to admit that all this "light unto the world" horseshit was just that - horseshit. America's shit stinks just like everybody else's. Americans are just as cruel and evil and corrupt as everybody else on the planet, and it's about goddamn time they came right out and admitted it.

You know how America "leads the world"? By force. By pointing guns at everybody else's heads and saying "do this or we'll kill you." There's America's so-called "moral superiority" in a nutshell - superior weaponry, and the willingness to kill anybody who doesn't go along with whatever they want.

Fucking Nazi pricks. The destruction of America would be the best thing that could happen for the world and the human race, and I hope I live long enough to see it.