The Amazing Adventures of Secret Shithead

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Meet John Shelley. John runs a garden center in Pennsylvania.

John seems decent enough at first glance - gardeners tend to be gentle people. His site is filled with images of green growing things, and lots of information on how to grow them yourself. He even shares the truly touching tale of the recent death of his cat.

But John leads a secret life as a right-wing whackjob, as shown by this charming sentiment from the entry page to his online journal:

If you are a whining, hand-wringing, bed-wetting, liberal-demokkkRAT-progressive-socialist-fascist-commie-nazi-islamofascist, or are easily offended, leave now.

It gets worse:

Liberal-demokkkRAT Scumbags.
A judge this week, threw out a civil lawsuit filed against William Kennedy Smith (RAPIST-FL) by a former personal assistant who alleged he sexually assaulted her. Smith, the nephew of fat, slovenly, alcoholic, drug-addicted, murderous US Sen Edward "Chappaquiddick Swimmer" Kennedy (MURDERER-MA), has repeatedly denied he assaulted Audra Soulias. In 1991, a Florida jury acquitted Smith of sexual assault and battery on a 30-year-old woman he had met at a nightclub. He said his sexual relations with the woman had been consensual. Hmmmmmm, sure sounds like this Smith punk can't get any sex without force being used against the women. Typical liberal-demokkkRAT scumbag. Impeach the judge and execute Smith.

Then there's this delightful thought:

Some People Just Need Killing™.
American citizen Medea Benjamin, a leader of the anti-American group Code Pink, announced in Amman, Jordan this week that Code Pink, it's parent group Global Exchange and Families for Peace have donated $600,000 in aid to the 'other side' in the terrorist haven city of Fallujah in Iraq. The Benjamin bitch needs prompt execution for treason.

Starting to feel just a little less sympathy for his feline loss? Here, let me help you out:

With no publicly-discernable morals, values or mores, liberal-demokkkRATs are wildly floundering to re-establish and cement their position as obstructionist, America-hating, anti-US Military, liberal-progressive-demokkkRAT-socialist-commie-nazi-fascist, lowlife, subhuman, deviant, degenerate filth. Alcoholic Kennedy, Botox Pelosi, Dusty Reid, Obama Osama, UpChuck Schumer, Hitlery Rotten Klintoon, Boxer Shorts, KKK Byrd, Liar Kerry, Scream Dean, Krazy Kuchinich, Loser LIEberman, Lurch Kerry, Jumping Jeffords, AlGoreBore, Arlie Sphincter... I could go on and on and on and on.

And he does. On and on and on and on, until you're ready to puke.

I think the part that gets me the most is that this is a business website. Sure, there's no link from the main page to the jingo journal, but it's not that hard to find. I noticed he doesn't link directly to the journal from his kitty memorial page, which makes me wonder if one (or more) of his liberal customers gave him shit about it after reading the kitty story and then being blindsided by the hatefest.